Ultimately, experts agree that its predatory tone illustrates our culture's discomfort with older women exploring their sexuality. Why name such a woman after a violent animal, and why is there no male counterpart? Is it not a good thing that women of any age can embrace their sexuality? Others find it offensive. It is a concept, maybe even a movement, but women and even some men are conflicted over what many feel is a derogatory term. The term, which germinated in the bars of Vancouver in 2001, originally referred to a woman in her early 40s pursuing a man in his late 20s, but has come to define any woman in a romance with a younger man. "It's OK for men to date younger women, but when the roles are reversed it implies that there's something wrong with the woman."Īfter all, cougars, by definition, are stalk-and-ambush predators.
"I find the term a bit offensive," said Marsden, of Fremont. By modern estimations, she would be a "cougar." But if she were single and dating, Marsden would have to deal with a new label. Today, she is happily married to a man eight years her junior. When she was a junior in high school and introduced her mother to her freshman boyfriend, she was accused of "robbing the cradle." We just have more in common."Īnd, for just as long, Marsden, 53, has been aware of the May-December double standard.
"I know they're not going to be fuddy-duddys," she said. WALNUT CREEK - For as long as she can remember, Rhonna Marsden has preferred to date younger men.